Hello Reader,

Well, it has been a whirlwind over here in the last three weeks, since learning that Honey Brook Stables is being sold, sending our babies off to college, beginning my second to last semester of grad school, and moving Kodiak Jack to his new home at Take Heart.

How are things in your neck of the woods?

Yeah, my life feels a bit overwhelming, to say the least! But by God's grace, I am doing really well. No seriously, my husband and therapist are both in awe at how I'm handling all of this. Actually, so am I. Maybe I've gotten better at learning how to dance to the music.

My colleague at Take Heart shared this image with me, as it reminded her of a story I shared at our staff meeting, conveying that I believe God used riding horses and dancing, especially tap dance, to enable me to resiliently move through the toughest parts of my childhood. Rhythm and movement are proven to be regulating to the nervous system, quieting the survival instincts that are activated in traumatic environments. I love that this image captures both for me. While the look on the horse's face is pretty stressed, that is the reality of survival, especially when you are in the midst of it.

But survival no longer defines my way of being. The years invested in healing emotionally through the support of therapy and growing biblically deep roots have reaped great benefits. That is why I can move through present chaos without being undone.

Don't get me wrong. I've cried buckets, especially while listening to the most cathartic but depressing country playlist while packing up the Stableminded barn. Nothing could have prepared me for this unexpected turn of events. There is grief that can't find words. There is a deep loss of dreams. And yet there is something good about having to pack things up and put your hands on something tangible when your brain can't make sense of your reality. Even the shed tears have been healing. A new friend shared with me that the research shows that tears get toxins out of the body. So I should be pretty toxin-free at this point.

There's also a toxin-freeness that comes when you know that God's got you in the palm of His hands. You can allow that sorrow to rise up and even give room for anger and frustration to be felt. But you don't have to hold onto it or internalize it. You can move through those emotions, again and again, and let them rest at the foot of the cross while recounting the overwhelmingness of His grace.

Yes, my faith is enduring boldly, and yet I've not been without worry or anxiety, especially in the days leading up to moving Kody to Take Heart. Horses don't do well being separated from their herd, and I feared the worst for Kody, especially considering his past trauma history and relatively recent treatment for ulcers. We armed ourselves with a preventative, but will still need to watch him closely.

The first day was the toughest, with his anxiety and crying out increasing until nightfall. Yes, horses cry. You know it when you hear it -- a piercing call looking for a response. It was heartbreaking, and only lessened when I was with him and keeping him engaged. I thought I might need to pitch a tent in his field. #helicoptorhorsemom 🤪 Thankfully, a calming supplement seemed to take the edge off and we felt God's mercies fall afresh the next morning as we greeted a calm but nickering Kodiak Jack, happy to see us and continuing to settle into his new home.

While this entire process has been daunting, I'm grateful for all the good. God is so kind to fulfill my childhood dream of owning a horse and then the bonus of being in two barn communities where the partnership with such a creature is so highly valued and respected.

So the little girl inside of me is still dancing, ready for the next song to play.

Speaking of which, songs will be playing at sunset on the hilltop at Take Heart this Saturday! Come join me at Worship Night on the Ranch! I can attest that it is such a lovely event because I attended last year. I know. Crazy. And I might have secretly whispered to the Lord about how much I'd like to be a part of a community and mission like this one, never imagining that He just might answer that prayer, and open the doors to bring me to Take Heart. I know, be careful what you pray for . . . or maybe don't be careful at all.

So here's to dancing to the music, my friend.

Tapping on,

Lisa

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P.S. If I could, I'd dance with this group to one of my favorite incredibly co-regulating rhythmic songs.

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